Lupin headcanon (one shot)

Please note that while i am aware that Lupin is a halfblood i am going on the assumption that his mother was a muggleborn, not a muggle.

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He sat, very much alone, in a carriage his father had chosen for him on the Hogwarts Express. His father had boarded the train with him under the premise of placing his trunk somewhere safe and finding him a good seat so he could see the view. Remus knew that it was to make sure he would be safe from the other children.

  Remus Lupin had lived a very eventful and unhappy life. His mother and father treated him with utmost care and attention, practically wrapping him in cotton wool to protect him from others, and he knew that it was why today his father was being especially careful with him.

Remus was a werewolf. Bitten aged 4 by a werewolf Fenrir Greyback after his father had called him ‘half-bred scum’ in a tavern argument.

It was an insult that his father still bore with the premature lines of age on his forehead, and the bruises and cuts from keeping his only son in place during the full moon.

Remus had always assumed that Hogwarts was not a place he would ever go and that his mother and father had tried to cheer him up by insisting they would teach him everything he needed to know as a Wizard—but Remus didn’t see the point of learning to be a Wizard if he could not be around other people.

For the first few years of his life, they had lived life as travellers. Always moving from place to place after the full moon when the locals saw what young Remus ‘had done’.

Broken beds and demolished furniture in tavern rooms, cattle that had been ripped apart. Claw marks on the walls of stables.

They had lived a transient life—and despite everything his father did to keep them ‘normal’ and happy. Remus grew up alone, persecuted, and ashamed.

  When he was 10, a man with long white hair and a long white beard came to talk to his parents.

Thinking that it was just another angry man who wanted compensation for a broken cart or a destroyed flock, Remus hid from him until the man smiled at him and asked him to come and talk to him.

The man’s name was Albus Dumbledore and was the headmaster of a Hogwarts, the same place his mother and father had attended as students. He explained to Remus how he had had the most brilliant idea that would enable him to attend as a normal student and live life as a normal wizard—for at least most of the month.

Remus thought about it for a few days, then owled the headmaster personally—accepting.

Remus’ father was delighted but his mother was fretful. How could the castle, with so many young students safely house a growing werewolf child and still keep them all safe. Remus told his mother not to worry, and did something he rarely did. He smiled.

Scraping together the money for books, robes, and equipment. Remus’ father tried to get his son as much as he could. Living from place to place for many years had led to their vault becoming increasingly empty.

Yet here he was, on the hogwarts express. With a brand new wand, brand new clothes, and a trunk with his name on.

Remus John Lupin.

His mother had taught him a number of spells over the summer holiday. Rapid healing spells, quick cleaning spells, spells to repair things, anything that could alleviate his condition and hide it quickly. Remus noted that every time he mastered a spell, her smile was quivery and full of worry.

And now as she bid him goodbye from the platform, frozen tears were in her eyes…

  He felt almost guilty at leaving.

As the great steam train chugged into life he felt the pull of the train forwards before moving from view.

Managing a brave smile that faltered at the corners, he felt one of the smaller, slighter scars on his face pull, reminding him yet again of who, and what he was.

  The tears in his mothers eyes broke and rolled down her cheeks as his father gave his son a strong nod, holding her close.

  The platform faded from view and Remus realized that for the first time, he was around other people, without his parents to protect him.

An agonizing, dull twist that had made itself known recently more and more often was growing persistantly in his stomach and made him feel sick, gripping his wand out of sheer desire to something familiar he looked at the sky. The reassurance that the full moon was in 4 days away held no logic for him. What if the stress of it all brought on an attack?

Closing his eyes, he breathed shakily and deeply, hoping to calm some sense into himself.

What if the sorting hat tells everyone what i am?

What if i attack a teacher?

What if the care of magical creatures professor knows what i am?

"Oi!"

  Remus looked up nauseaously.

A thick haired Slytherin who looked around 16 wearing a shiny badge was glaring angrily at him.

"Prefects only, squirt!"

"S-S-Sorry!"

"OUT."

  Just then a blonde haired Gryffindor girl wearing a similar badge shoved the slytherin prefect.

"Don’t be a prat. He’s only a first year…come on mate, let’s find you somewhere nicer to sit." she offered kindly, offering her hand.

  Taking her hand, he became very aware of how wet and cold his own hand was and how disgusting it must feel.

"Found this chap pestering the driver. You two have a nice chat…hope to see you both in Gryffindor!" She smiled as she showed him to another carriage.

  The boy in the same carriage had blonde hair, watery eyes, and a look of perpetual nervousness.

"Hi." Remus managed.

"Hi…" the boy replied, looking shifty.

"…Remus John Lupin." Lupin offered, somewhat at odds with his nervousness.

"…Peter Pettigrew."

  The boys shook hands.

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Please note that while i am aware that Lupin is a halfblood i am going on the assumption that his mother was a muggleborn, not a muggle.